So much fiber, so little time

No further comment necessary

The name of the upcoming Capitol Steps album is Four More Years in the Bush Leagues.

To quote the Brits ...

... my employers couldn't plan a piss-up in a brewery. Mind you, I work for a business school, so you're all screwed too.

Fuming

OK, I know it's a TV show and it's fiction, but I'm still fuming over last night's episode of that ode to shallowness, Sex and the City. Short version: Cavalier King Charles spaniel bitch comes into heat; eejits let her off lead in a dog park, where said bitch shouldn't have been in the first place; surprise!. Even shorter version: shit for brains.

And this of course is just before Westminster, when the fool Afghan breeder and even bigger fool Joe Garagiola will rhapsodize about dog showing as a family sport. Nuh uh, it's not a family sport until neutered animals can be shown in breed, as is true for cat shows. The average family just should not have intact dogs, because keeping a bitch out of circulation for three week periods two or three times a year is hard. I know - Cookie is a (thankfully ex-) show dog.

Duck and cover

Well, today is the first day of gun-hunting season around here, which is a nightmare for those of us with livestock. To note the day, I always play Tom Lehrer's The Hunting Song while rooting for the bozoids to take each other out of the gene pool:

People ask me how I do it,
And I say "There's nothin' to it,
You just stand there lookin' cute,
And when something moves, you shoot!"
And there's ten stuffed heads in my trophy room right now:
Two game wardens, seven hunters, and a pure-bred Guernsey cow.

Eejits

You know the saying "Give a man a fish, and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and you feed him for life."? Nuh-uh! You just get lots of stupid questions about fishing - and you probably have to take the hooks out too. (See also this.)

Yes, it's a mega-Monday ...